Personal

Gender, sex, relationships, trauma, mental health, intimate struggles and celebrations. Some of this writing is 18+ only, some will have content warnings.

To answer the question: “Do you still sing?”

I have learned that there is a difference between my physical voice, and my voice in the broader sense. I have mastered my physical voice - all the nuances, the breaking points; learned the ways my voice likes to move and blossom. There is freedom and joy in the practise of using my voice in that way on stage. But I needed something more.

Vulnerability Magic: One Year Sober

Inspired by a little silver plastic chip in my pocket that said “Women in Recovery” on one side and the serenity prayer on the other (and my phone full of new numbers), I found a desire within me that I hadn’t even known I wanted until I stepped into that meeting. I wanted myself back.

Using Your Voice Again: A Plan of Action

Let yourself rage against all the reasons you stopped using your voice. Rage against money, capitalism, the lie of meritocracy, the optimism of youth, the institutions that lulled you into passivity, the warnings you did not heed, misogyny. Shame, emotional abuse, trauma, microagressions. Sore throats, lies. Shed your tears for all those moments of connection you lost because you did not sing. 

No More Silence

I know I am not the first person to speak, and that the reason I am able to find the courage to do so is because I am adding my voice to the chorus of many who have come before me. I honour those who said the first word, then the second and third.

Rehearsing Trauma: How working on an opera helped me heal

How do I embody a character fully, fall in love with the character, learn its idiosyncrasies, when that character must undergo torture daily on stage, sometimes multiple times, with increasing detail, depth, and dramatic timing? How do I rehearse trauma?

33 Reasons to Make Art Today

You want to.That’s how art gets made - when it is made today. No art ever gets made tomorrow.It will make your day ...

Clarity

‘Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.’  -Thomas ...

Summer Job

I don’t want a summer job. All year, I was supported by my Teaching Assistantship, my scholarship, grants, and ...

Post-Post-Grad

So – that was that.  My master’s degree.  Was I dreaming? I have been recently hit with the common ...

Everything but…

I have been feeling very keenly lately the urgent need for variety in life.  All year, as my posts have ...

Education

This reading week, I am trying to complete all the coursework I have left for the semester, so I can focus on ...

Opportunity vs. Money

As I draw closer to graduation, I find myself turning down opportunities. I use all kinds of excuses – I ...

Peace

After my angst-ey previous post, I bet you are wondering, dear reader, how things went in Berlin! Things went ...

The Berlin Series: Art

If there was one word to describe Berlin, it would be 'angst'. The tumultuous history of the city still feels ...

The Berlin Series: Flights

I am going to try something new to blog about this trip. I will publish a series of posts focussing on my ...

Throw me a bone…

How much control do we really have over our future?  In my life so far, and especially in the past few years, I ...

2011 and 25!

So here we are - a new year, a new semester, a new decade, and I just turned 25. I don't really feel like ...

Candel’s in The getto

I woke up at 4:45am to catch the public transit to the airport. The goal: arrive in Manhattan in time to sing my ...

What singing is all about for me

I want to share with you something that re-awoke in me the very essence of singing and what it means to be a good ...

Please support the CBC

CBC Radio is the reason why I love classical music, and why I initially came to love Canada, my country. Our ...

Snow, Silence, and Success

Do they come together?  They did this week! Snow: For weeks, we endured the dry-ish, rainy cold.  No ...

How can I make a difference?

There is so much suffering, poverty, and injustice in this world. Some of us see it more often than others. I ...

Apologizing

A colleague of mine recently initiated a wonderful peer-evaluating performance group. We meet every week and sing ...

Apologizing

A colleague of mine recently initiated a wonderful peer-evaluating performance group.  We meet every week and ...

Beauty

I am trying to stay focussed on the reason why I decided to make music for a living. Beyond all of the judgement ...

Biking in Montreal

I am one of those crazy people. You know, those people who decide that they would like to transport themselves ...

The best I’ve ever sung in NYC

I am convinced: the best way to travel is by train. It is the greenest, safest, most scenic and most relaxing ...

Balance

Balancing school and a slowly growing singing career is very difficult.  There is external pressure to invest in ...

Making Music

Something special happened today.Mid-afternoon, I had my voice lesson. While singing the Presentation of the Rose ...

Nostalgia

Wherever I am in fall, it always makes me nostalgic – either nostalgic in advance of the time when I will actually ...

End of the Beginning

I was five years old when I started Kindergarten. I remember my main goal in kindergarten was to be allowed to go ...

An Actor’s Vow

By Elia Kazan I will take my rightful place on the stage And I will be myself. I am not a cosmic orphan, I have no ...

Tracy

What a summer this has been! Of course, I started the summer with the intention of learning Figaro, as well as ...

Funding

As you may or may not know, the ability to travel to sing for various conductors and directors is essential in the ...

Discipline

It is hard to live a balanced life when you are a singer, and even more so as a student. First of all, you have ...

Challenge

People want to work with people who are interesting and who stroke their own egos. People don't want to work with ...

Well-roundedness

I have alot of different interests. Someday, I would love to open a restaurant, a café, a bookstore. I always ...

Beautiful text from Corinne

Love yourself.MAKE PEACE with who you areand where you at this moment in time.Listen to your heart.If you can’t ...

Tough Questions

I recently posted a list of questions from Wolf Trap Opera's blog about pursuing a career in the performing arts. ...

The question

The question always is:What is that intangible thing that distinguishes a good performer from a great ...

Getting things done

Today I started following the blog of someone I don't know, but which was recommended to me by a friend. It is ...

Vocal discoveries

After making my recording last week, I needed a few epiphanies to help me start to really love my voice again, and ...

Recording

Making a recording is always interesting. In fact, I believe I began a blog post with that exact sentence about a ...

Things I need to learn…

...or am in the process of learning.-Even though embellishments and ornamentation are sometimes expected, the ...

On Marking

Kay, Elster. Bel Canto and the Sixth Sense: A discursive and technical essay on the traditional Italian physical ...

Happy Coincidences

My day spent in New York was, for the most part, one of those days where nothing goes wrong. We woke up to a ...

New York

I haven't been to New York since two years ago when I was here with my mom. At that time, I was about to make the ...

A night at the opera

It is 2 am and I am not supposed to blog, but that is when these things come to me. Inopportune times. In fact, ...

A new dance

The past few days I have been sick. This is normally a bad thing, but this time it has enabled me to finish alot ...

Getting Settled

Things have been clicking and clicking and clicking into place in the past few weeks. Finally, I am beginning to ...

Focus

I think most people know me as a fairly hard worker. I hate to admit it, but whenever someone has said that to ...

Highlights in Montreal

-Going into the practise rooms at 9:00pm on a Saturday night and having to WAIT for a practise room. It is so ...

Beginnings at McGill

Ever since before I began my undergrad, I wanted to attend McGill. Montreal seemed so far away and culturally ...